Still Rolling

I was on a roll.

Got the degree in law.
Was proposed to by the boyfriend of eight years.
Had incredible support and blessing from family and friends.
Bought a house.
Prepped for the wedding.
Got tickets to the honeymoon.
Everything going just as I had pictured in my head.

Then came the hitch as they always do in the movies as in real life.

My name was nowhere on the list of passers. Let me just say it straight up. It sucks. There simply are no other words. It friggin’ sucks. I don’t want to hear an “it’s OK” because it’s not. This is what came off the four years I invested. It’s horrible. It’s a damned big hitch to my roll.

I told Clint last month that if I make it on the list, I would truly and honestly be able to say that, at least for the moment, I will want nothing more. There’s so much good going on that I was overdue for a wake up call. Maybe it’s way too soon to have everything at quarter life.

Fine ties with a family who’s always got my back since forever. A handful of friends who I know genuinely care. A wedding to celebrate. A trip to be excited for. A new house to finish decorating and move in to. And a partner with whom I have a relationship of which I’m often told many could only yearn for. The big things, and more, all at twenty-five. That’s more than some people can have in a lifetime.

This is a journey and I’m never one to sleep or sulk during the ride. I will not let pass the good things because of one dark cloud. I’m still here. And the ball is still rolling.